IS YOUR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE GENUINE?
“The emotionally intelligent person is skilled in four areas: identifying emotions, using emotions, understanding emotions, and regulating emotions.” — Quote by John Mayer and Peter Salovey
Emotional intelligence (also known as Emotional Quotient or EQ) is the ability of a person to understand and manage one’s emotions to reduce stress, communicate and empathise, and disperse contentious issues. People with high emotional intelligence do better and are able to enhance their overall soft skills with time. It refers to the ability to be aware, control, and express emotions in a regulated manner. Yoga, Meditation, and mindfulness courses/exercises play a key role in developing it.
In this blog, we examine the issue of faking emotional intelligence, especially in the work place. Many times, it's been noticed that people who claim a high degree of EI / EQ are only catering to their own needs, even though they are under the impression that it is beneficial for others involved. This involves the wrong use of emotional intelligence to garner responses that may not be in the interest of the other person(s).
While empathising, be aware of your turning into a superhero by trying to help / save the other person from their situations or predicament. It would not be right to try to save the other person from the consequences of the situations / challenges they are undergoing.
If you have strong views/opinions on an issue, stand by it. Take ownership. Hiding your views to engage with others does not bear results in the long run. It’s fake. State your views and then be a good listener. This way the other party knows that you will be an effective and a genuine listener.
Don't disguise your need for affirmation from colleagues (peer or junior) by combining / masking it with self – awareness. For example, asking colleagues “Am I too impatient” or “Am I aggressive in-office meetings”. It is clear to people that you are seeking compliments/affirmation even though it has been masked by the clever use of words.
Be genuine with your EI / EQ at all times. Use it properly and it will serve you well in the long run. As Mr. RS Maan, our Global CRO says “Emotional intelligence is the mandate of the hour. It is what separates leaders from the rest of the pack”.